Happiness, Contentment, and Fulfillment Comes From God, Not a Relationship Status

A little over a year ago I wrote a post titled Celebrating the Blessing of Singleness + A Challenge

If you haven’t read it yet, (or it’s been a long time) then just so you have some context for this post, it might be good to hop over and read it real quick….

Done?  Ok, great!

At the time I wrote it,  I was reveling in my singleness; I was happy, content, at peace, and felt completely fulfilled and blessed by God.  Even though it may seem as though it was because of my singleness that I felt that way, it was really because I knew 100% that I was in God’s will at that time.  I was seeing answered prayer and the desires of my heart being granted left and right as I pursued many opportunities God gave me in photography, martial arts, and other things during that season of my life.  I was taking full advantage of everything that season had to offer, and I felt on top of the world.

A year later, things are a little different for me.  I am in a relationship with a man that has been one of my best friends over the last couple years.  And I am happy, content, at peace, and feel completely fulfilled and blessed by God.  Again, not because of the place I find myself at, even though I’m enjoying it immensely, but because I have complete confidence that I’m in God’s will for me right now.  I’m still passionately pursuing the many opportunities God has laid in front of me, which includes being in a relationship with someone I care a lot about.  I feel on top of the world.

If you were paying close attention, you noticed that nothing except my circumstances changed between those two paragraphs.  My outlook on life and where I am at, is the same with the exception of my circumstances.  I didn’t say that my life was good before, but now it is 100 times better because I’m in a relationship.  It’s not.  My life was awesome then, and it is now too because I know I’m in God’s will.

The seasons of my life that I can look back on as being the most memorable, enjoyable, best times of my life, are the ones where I had absolute confidence that I was in God’s will –  Because contentment + feeling happy and fulfilled is a direct result of that knowledge.  It doesn’t come because you are in your dream relationship, are married, or have children.   Happiness and fulfillment may accompany those things, but it’s not found in those things alone.

People can think they are happy or fulfilled by those things alone, but when those things are without the confidence that you are in God’s will it is a counterfeit version that still leaves a person with questions, doubts, fears, and feeling hollow inside.   It’s not the real deal, authentic, peace filled version of it.   No person, relationship, job, accomplishment, or anything else can ever replace the peace, security, and happiness of being in God’s will.

It can be easy to jump the gun and try to make things happen in our own timing and strength.  When everyone around you seems to be dating, engaged, or married, and your focus is on the “status” and not God’s will, it can be hard to wait it out.   But no temporary gratification from a relationship is worth the long term doubts, what-ifs, or opportunities lost because you weren’t in God’s will.

My goal, (and the challenge I would extend to you) is to seek God’s will first, not a status.  Because it is there in His will we find contentment, happiness, and fulfillment and can more fully enjoy everything in front of us right now.

Annndddd that’s all for now folks!  I hope to be getting back into the swing of posting before too long, after the summer crazies slow down, but until then posts may be sporadic. 🙂    

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